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| Chastity Bono, daughter of 1970’s T.V. icons Sonny and Cher, recently announced that she would be having a sex change operation. Bono has been a gay rights activist for nearly 20 years, since coming out of the closet and announcing to the world that she was gay.|
Hence forth, Chastity wants to be referred to as “he” or “Chaz.”
I think that Chastity’s decision makes an incredible case for those who oppose gay marriages. Even Chastity herself is uncomfortable being in a gay relationship. So much so, that she is undergoing the excruciating process of adding a penis, removing her breasts, and undergoing hormone treatments.
Often times, gay rights activists preach the message of “acceptance” under the guise that everyone should be accepted as they are regardless of their sexual preferences. How can we embrace this message from someone who can not tolerate or accept herself as she has been created? She is SO unhappy with her lesbian status that she is willing to do whatever it takes to no longer be a homosexual, but be in a heterosexual situation.
If it’s true that Chastity will no longer tolerate being called “she,” which she is, and insist on being called “he,” which she is not, she is reenforcing the idea that it’s not okay to be who she is. She’s even under the impression that changing her name will, in effect, make her change real.
If I were to cut my breasts off, it would no more make me male than the man on the moon. I would still be female. If I added a fictional body part, penis or otherwise, I would still be a female. If I changed my name to Charles (“Chaz”), it still wouldn’t make me any more male than the day I was born. Denying the truth of who I am will never make me any less me.
I listened to “news anchors” on an entertainment “news” program discussing this topic and one anchor posed this question to another reporter, “Is Chastity a leader?” The reporter exclaimed that absolutely Chastity was a leader; an innovative, fearless advocate for doing the progressive thing in the area of gay rights.
Huh? How is she a leader when she is completely confused about who she is? Is she gay? Is she not gay? Is she a man? Is she a woman? What’s her name? To call her a leader simply due to her unconventionalism is ridiculous. I wonder how her gay-rights lesbian friends feel about her switching sides. She is no longer comfortable with female lover relationships, to the extreme.
I’m ecstatic that Chastity is so restless in her spirit that she has never been at peace with this life-choice she’s made for herself. Unfortunately for her, I’m positive that she won’t be at any more peace by denying who she is and attaching a penis. Being able to stand up and pee is not the issue. The issue is that she has been seriously damaged and she must deal with that outside of her sexuality. Until she gets to the root of what that’s done to her, she could attach a unicorn horn to the top of her head and it won’t make a bit of difference.
|What would Dean want? I often pose that question. And then another. What would I want Dean to do if our roles had been reversed? I would hope that he would go on to live a victorious life; one full of promise, love, joy, and that gave glory to God in everything. I just don’t know if I can live up to that. How to go on without my wonderful partner? My heart cries out. I long for his arms. To hear his heart beating so loudly that it wakes me from a deep sleep. God entwined our spirits so completely that I don’t know how it’s possible to sever that tie now. How? Only God knows. Only God has the way. I trust Him. He is still beautiful to me. I still trust my Lord in all that He does. I just don’t know how to do what He’s called me to.|
I do not want to shame my Lord, by relying on the man he gave me more than the One who made him. Yet, it is so hard. Dean was so gorgeous to look at, from within and on the exterior. The creator dumped so much into this one person. It was no surprise to me that people vied for his attention. That nearly everyone who met him looked up to him, not just physically but on a spiritual level. Most people knew that they were in the presence of someone whom God had blessed immensely.
I’m so proud to have been Dean’s wife. I’m so proud to have been the woman who carried his children and is responsible for raising his boys.
There is no way to erase a person like Dean from our minds. He is as much my husband today as he ever has been. I don’t know how to untie that knot. I am a married woman with a husband that is in another realm. It will always be that way.
The trauma of that night plays out in our minds daily. We fight and beat back the images that harass us, trying to make it through each day. And yet, we know we have a loving God who cherishes us and wants only the best for us. I take great comfort in knowing that God loves Dean WAY more and EXCEEDINGLY ABUNDANTLY more than I could ever dream of loving him. Knowing that, knowing that he would only choose the very best for His children, I rest. I believe.
I miss you, honey. I know that you don’t care about the worries of this world any longer, but our hearts break for you, in missing you every second of every day.
| Okay, so for Mother's Day, Dean got me the prettiest pair of running shoes. Pink and Mocha (love it!). So, yesterday was the first time I've run in a couple of years. I ran a mile and a half and thought that was good enough for a start. What has prompted this new enthusiasm for running, you might ask? I saw my reflection in a mirror at a clothing store and didn't even recognize myself and I turned right around, went home, put on the shoes and headed out.|
I don't know how it's possible to carry 20 pounds of extra weight on my rear and thighs alone, but I manage to do it somehow. I gain very little weight anywhere else and so it's just bizarre when I put on even 10 pounds. Have you ever picked up a 5 pound bag of potatoes??? It's pretty darn heavy and lumpy. How do I fit two of those on each leg and bun???
And now that Dean is Uber Postman walking all over town and skinnier than I've seen him in eons, I can't stay this way. I'll be on the beach in a few weeks and at this point I could do irreparable damage to my very expensive swimsuit. Elastic can only stretch so much!
So, in a couple of days I turn 40, and while I was running I did all I could to push that out of my mind, saying to myself, "I'm an Army girl. I feel the same as I did when I was 20. I can do this. Stop being a woos..." You know, encouraging stuff like that.
So, cheer me on!!! Who knows, maybe I could run a 5K like Michelle in a few months. Or, maybe I'll just be able to fit into my small clothes.
| I had to confront someone the other day about some really destructive behavior and now I feel sad. I hate this feeling. You always wonder when you confront someone if that's gonna be the end of the relationship. In the end, you have to be obedient to God, but it's still enormously difficult.|
I wish Jess and the Caps lived close by. They always brighten my day and I could sure use a walk, a talk, and some coffee with them.
Dean's busy every moment of the day, poor guy. He's got so many irons in the fire. We're praying for some rest from it all soon.
Lochlan has started football weight training at the high school. So far, so good. I'll be checking into registering him for classes at the community college because they can do that as freshmen in H.S. here. That should be interesting. I might sign him up for drama or musical theater at the high school. He can pick and choose what classes he wants to participate in at the H.S. as a homeschooler. Pretty sweet deal.
I'll sign Lucas up for art or PE at the public school. If it doesn't work out for him, I can always stop.
My niece, Nicole, is bringing 5 friends up from MIZZOU this weekend for a visit. It should be fun having a gang of girls in the house and showing them around town.